Sexual Assault

Beneath the surface of the protective parts of trauma survivors there exists an undamaged essence, a Self that is confident, curious, and calm, a Self that has been sheltered from destruction by the various protectors that have emerged in their efforts to ensure survival. Once those protectors trust that it is safe to separate, the Self will spontaneously emerge, and the parts can be enlisted in the healing process

-Bessel A. van der Kolk

My Gratitude For Visiting My Site  I hope that you'll reach out to begin your journey of healing from sexual assault with me.  And, if you feel that I'm not the right person to help you, I hope that you trust your own internal wisdom, and that you continue your search for support. 

 

You Are A Valuable Part Of This World  You deserve to feel safe and powerful in your own body and community.  And you deserve the healing and peace you are seeking.​

I Want To Offer You Something  A framework of practical steps to approach change and the therapeutic process.  While this framework is widely applicable, it is particularly geared towards healing from trauma and sexual assault in particular. 

 

This framework is not just intended for those who've experienced sexual assault, but also for the family, partners, and friends that love you. 

"Darling, you feel heavy because you are too full of truth. Open your mouth more. Let the truth exist somewhere other than inside your body." -della hicks-wilson

At the heart of all the work I do with others is a belief that healing trauma is best achieved when we have a firm balance between Patience, Reality, and Hope.​  Whether you're struggling with a sexual assault experience that happened yesterday or 50 years ago, I hope these principles are of service to you.  

Patience   

  • Give yourself time to get to know the Impact.  Traumatic experience can effect us in profound and subtle ways.  It's ok to not fully understand everything right now.

  • Respect the time it can take to reconnect with your strengths, your resources, and your needs.

  • Remain tolerant of the whole process.  Healing can and often does come with ups and downs.  Let go of the expectation that healing should look a certain way or take a certain amount of time.

  • Stop pressuring yourself to stop it, get over it, just move on, or be done already.

Reality

  • Healing is a process that takes time.  Sometimes things feel like they're getting worse before they get better.

  • While some types of therapy will serve you better than others, there are no quick and easy fixes.

  • Trauma is something done to us.  Healing is something we have to do for ourselves -- but we do not have to do it alone.

Hope

  • Hope is about building and maintaining a belief that the process is worth it and
    possible.

  • Find workable options – In the midst of a traumatic situation we are left with very few to literally no options but ones of last resort (Fight, Flight, Freeze, Submit).  Hope, on the other hand, exists when desirable options are present and we believe that we can achieve them.

  • Hope is a state of mind.  It is not something we can feel without first believing it exists.  Brene' Brown has a wonderful talk about this you can watch here.

  • Hope is teachable, and learnable.

  • Hope is built when we develop and reach goals.  And we need more that just big goals.   We need small ones too.

    • Set a goal, no matter how small.  Congratulate yourself for reach​ing it.  And be gentle with yourself if you don't.
       

Always Remember That Healing Is Possible

"There is no person that I would rather journey with into the dark reaches of my disowned self - pain or even shame - in complete confidence that he would always steadfastly regard me in wholeness, in light, and in love. No matter how frightened, fragmented or ugly I feel in any moment, I can always trust that Hudson can see the health and strength in me, and compassionately guide me towards re-membering my highest self. Hudson’s capacity for allied healing is something I have always marveled at. I testify with complete confidence in his ability and commitment to journey whole-heartedly with you into your shadow, or into your fire, and unwaveringly revere you in health and wholeness until you can confidently source those things within yourself."​

Terra Anderson, MA, R-DMT

Dance Movement Therapist, Artist

 

Contact me

today to set up a Free 30 minute

in-person consult.

Hudson Wilkins, MA, LPCC, EMDR, IFS

He/Him/His

Fort Collins, CO

(615) 243-0874

Hudson@GrayAreaCounseling.com

© 2017 by Gray Area Counseling, LLC